My dad passed away tonight around 6pm. I have lost both of my fathers in the last 3 years and I must admit to feeling a bit in shock. I don't think it has sunk in yet.
We knew it was coming, this has been a year and a half of extreme health hardship, and another 6 years or so before that of great difficulty. He had been in serious pain since about 2009. He had extreme diabetes, heart problems, kidney problems and a slough of other issues. The kidneys got him in the end.
He loved theatre. He loved being the star. He directed and acted and was one of the biggest Divas on the planet and I say that with love (and maybe a bit of frustration, he could have done so much if he had set his ego aside). He played Tevye 4 times. It was his favorite role, his favorite play. Last year when he came out of the coma and didn't remember so many things, he still remembered Tevye. We did several shows together, Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe, Camelot, Fiddler on the Roof, Sound of Music and others. He was the head of the theatre department at Flathead Valley Community College for many years and loved to tell the story of when I was still in diapers I would come to rehearsals and sit and watch, I'd learn all the songs and dances and do them at the side of the stage. He said he would tell the actors "If she can do it, you can do it!".
He loved literature. He weaned me on the Hobbit, and Lord of the Rings, The Chronicles of Narnia. He was always reading to me. He loved poetry, and classic literature, he was well read on philosophy, psychiatry, history and several other topics. He was a trivia king. I'm told he used to have trivial pursuit parties. He always won any time I played with him. Even in the nursing home this last year on good days, we would play a trivia game I got for him. It was one of the few times he showed any animation.
He loved Cats, to him they were the best creatures. We always had them when I was growing up, at least 1, at max we had 4. He cherished them and spoiled them. They brought him joy in times when he had little other joy.
He gave me the love of these things Music, Travel, Food and Wine, Theatre and Literature and Cats.
He always wanted to be the hero. He wanted to help people. Our home was always open to friends in need of a place. He would lend an ear, offer advice, and happily feed his friends. He taught me the importance of this.
There was a lot of good in my dad. He was not perfect. He could be controlling, and abusive. He struggled with alcohol and prescribed drug abuse. He could be highly competitive and manipulative.
But tonight I will focus on the good things and the happy memories and be very glad that he is out of pain and misery. Goodbye Dad. I Love you.
8/10/2015 06:16:10 pm
8/11/2015 04:06:25 am
A beautiful eulogy. Very much how I remembered your dad.
8/12/2015 02:45:51 pm
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I've been blogging on and off for years. This is my area to explore food, wine, travel and various thoughts on life. My goal: Be True. Be Kind. Dream. Inspire. Discover. Create.